New York Times Scared to Print Shit

Posted by | March 08, 2009 | cities | No Comments

A journalistic cliche is that ‘Dog Bites Man’ isn’t a headline, but ‘Man Bites Dog’ is.

The New York Times has always been desperate to appear non-sensational to the extent of being dull and its headlines are sometimes almost willfully boring. My personal, all time favorite Times headline is: “No Anthrax Found in Pond”, i.e. nothing happened in an insignificant body of water. This is the equivalent of running ‘Dog Nearly Bit Man’.

In recent years the Times’ understatement has lead to neo-Edwardian prudery, which is ironic for the newspaper of record in a town where people are renowned for being thick skinned. Today’s example comes from middle of the road, star reporter, Thomas Friedman, who quotes the classic Onion article about a Chinese factory worker who cannot believe the crap he is making for American export. The Times censors the word shit, and removes 90% of the impact of the punch-line.

NYT:

“Often, when we’re assigned a new order for, say, ‘salad shooters,’ I will say to myself, ‘There’s no way that anyone will ever buy these.’ … One month later, we will receive an order for the same product, but three times the quantity. How can anyone have a need for such useless [garbage]?”

Onion:

“Often, when we’re assigned a new order for, say, ‘salad shooters,’ I will say to myself, ‘There’s no way that anyone will ever buy these,'” Chen said during his lunch break in an open-air courtyard. “One month later, we will receive an order for the same product, but three times the quantity. How can anyone have a need for such useless shit?”